i have moved, to the better(?) wordpress

http://ochod.wordpress.com

Local Train addict

Yes. This is my new addiction. I never thought one could get addicted to this sensory experience, but I did. Mumbai local trains, for the uninitiated, are the pinnacle of public transport. They claim to be, and it is not a modest claim, to be the lifeline of mumbai. Needless to say, the trains are so crowded during peak hours that the metaphor (or is it a similie, i always get confused) packed like sardines seems almost a benign comparison.

Lets get back to the point. What could be possibly good about travelling in the overcrowded local trains for hours, getting crushed in it, and 'man'handled at all wrong places. A one day affair with local trains will not show you the true beauty (if the beauty) of them. The sheer joy of getting a seat in the train is only comparable to getting 10 rs. ticket for sathyam after standing in queue for 3 hours. Then, of course, standing at the door with local train breezing past the city, overtaking other trains, rushing past stations is another level. the next level is seeing stroboscopic images when a train going in opposite direction passes you while you are going parallel to another train with the same speed.

But, the ultimate level, (yes you guessed correctly, it has something to do with girls) is when your train is overtaking some other train, and you are standing on the door, and you spot a beautiful girl in the ladies compartment in the other train and then she spots you, and you make eye contact for a few seconds, before one of the train either slows down or speeds up. That feeling, has never ever been matched by anything in my life. Its better than masturbation. Better than having the best alcohol I've had.

There are some other nice things about local trains. The people who travel in them are so gentlemanly. People who get seats, get up after half the journey so that people who are standing can rest their feet for some time. there is a sort of camaraderie between the people, who travel by the same local train in the same compartment day in and day out. They discuss everything from family problems to indian cricket team's doom, eventhough they only meet in local trains.

I am in love with local trains. God Save Me.

Note : some other nice things about travelling in mumbai. in buses, one can stand at strategic locations as see cleavages.
and i figured out why there are so many mirrors in the elevator. they exist so one can look at girls boobs without getting caught, either by her, or by her boyfriend.

I am drunk

yes!...finally i am drunk...dont be finicky abt the spellings coz i am drunk... it feels like you feel when u havent slept for a night...actually a bit more...but stilll ...somewhat that kinda feeling. if u dont feel for 2 nights u will prbably feel ecaxtly lke this.

shouvik said that u write wierd thingsw hen u r drunk. i hope when i read this when i am sane...it is wierd enuff...i dont want to be disaappointed by myslef....i will publish this now....


but i thik i have not written netyhing wierd...whne my sane self rads this ...he will be disaappointed...but what the hell he shud now the reality....


fuck him!

ochod fucker!

I am drunk

yes!...finally i am drunk...dont be finicky abt the spellings coz i am drunk... it feels like you feel when u havent slept for a night...actually a bit more...but stilll ...somewhat that kinda feeling. if u dont feel for 2 nights u will prbably feel ecaxtly lke this.

shouvik said that u write wierd thingsw hen u r drunk. i hope when i read this when i am sane...it is wierd enuff...i dont want to be disaappointed by myslef....i will publish this now....


but i thik i have not written netyhing wierd...whne my sane self rads this ...he will be disaappointed...but what the hell he shud now the reality....


fuck him!

ochod fucker!

crass cacophony

cute is cupid's cacophony
twisted is the turning tide
prose is the poem phoney
web is the world wide

open is the opulent orgy
tweaked is the twinkling time
closed are the kinky clergy
lovely is the lemony lime

talk is the time turner
jabbering is the joker job
book is the brain burner
mocking is the mundane mob

pervert pickdown poems...

this is what i and vineeth wrote on orkut scrapbook for various girls, the first line being girl specific. enjoy.

scary, your photo iss..a snake with a hiss..just a sec..ill piss...ahh..now miss...would u give me a kiss...dont delete thiss!

probably you will block me, you may...but not if i had my way...no no...i am not a gay...well...not in may....so hey...would you make my day...i am willing to pay.

cute cool charming bindaas...my ass..this is a pass..my horny lass..ao mere paas..bujhao meri pyaas...r u in my class?..cacophonous crass..your head is made of brass...or is it grass...or just bakwaas!

guru surf excel hai...i saw you on e-bay...below a gay...have u lost ur way..didnt get ur pay?...laying on hay...with hair(pubic) grey...u r my prey..go and pray..then play..ill eat your **** in a tray..nothing more to say

richa agarwall...did u get my call...i was waiting in the stall...in the mall..writing on the wall...noone stands tall..not as tall as hall..ready for a fall?..how big is ur ball?

The Night

It was a tuesday night. Just like any other night before a weekday.
It was a moonless night. Just like any other night, 14 nights before and after a moon-full night.
It was a cloudless night. Just like any other uncloudful night.
It was a starry night. Just like any other moonless, cloudless night.

Ochod, who had recently become bald, was sitting in the computer lab, with his usual plans to study. The computer lab was scarcely populated with usual souls. Everyone was well spaced out. There were no girls in the lab. On any other night, ochod would have opened youtube and search for Jennifer Connelly, Sharon Stone, Monica Belluci, Salma Hayek et al.

But tonight he chose not to. He himself was surprised at his decision. How could he get sick of watching Hot babes baring their non existent souls. How could he not want to watch sensous ladies and fantasize about them. He felt let down by his own self.

Was it because he had watched too much of it lately? then he could be excused. but he knew he hadnt seen it much. he was trying to convince himself that it is okay to not feel like watching porn once in a while, and that he has not lost interest in sex, and hence in life, and hence in the universe, and hence in everything.

and then, in the time interval that takes an actress to undress in a porn movie, an idea struck him. he got a brilliant argument to convince himself. it must be because its 12 already. so it is 14th feb. and 14th feb is all about love...and not sex! so he can be excused. Ha!

so,

It was a Pornless night. Just like no other night.

Being Bald


Barrenness on my head is symbolic, but what does it symbolize is a question which has many answers, all in their right, correct.

On one hand it symbolizes my move towards Buddhism or rather buddhist principles, of which the one which influenced me the most was baldness. Of course, i am strictly following the Buddhist principle of abstinence, not because i want to, but that i have no choice but to follow it.

On the other hand it symbolizes my barren and boring lifestyle, barren due to lack of girls, boring due to lack of entertainment avenues. gulzar's lyrics come to my mind

'Banjar hai sab Banjar hai,
Hum Dhoondhne Jab firdaus chale
teri khosh talaash mein dekh piya
hum kitne kaale kos chale'

another 14th feb comes and will go by, and ill remain a bald (buddhist?) bachelor being bugged by bugs bunny........thats all folks!!