Monday, September 18, 2006

On the beauty of beauty.

beauty is the most beautiful word i have ever heard, not just because it has such a close connection with booty. but for other reasons as well.

remember jim carrey in the truman show...b-e-a-utiful. my version goes like this be-a-u-tee-fool. of course when u tell a girl that she is beautiful, everyone knows what you really mean (bootyfull)

also beauty rhymes perfectly with duty

beauty also uses 3 vowels continuously...eau...which adds to its beauty.

beauty ends with a y.... so if someone says you are a beauty...he is very subtly making fun of you.

if you reverse the get ytuaeb.... so beautiful.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Robert Frost vis-a-vis Shreekumar Varma

Robert frost hated taking lectures at college...and when he took would be very informal and at his home. he hated giving exams even more.

once he gave an exam with just 1 question in it. what did you learn from my course. please give a brief answer.

his favourite response was, "not a damm bit"

when asked how much did he give to the student...he replied...90 out of 100. when asked... why not 100...he replied...because he got the spelling of damn wrong!

there was another author named shreekumar varma.

once he too gave an exam with lots of questions in it, which essentially meant...what have you learnt from my course. of course he did not want his students to be brief (otherwise he wouldnt have given so many questions).

a student's response was..."not a damn bit". of course it was not so shreekumar varma wanted an elaborate answer.

he gave the student a CD..which was 1 more than the worst grade he could give. when asked why did he give the student such bad marks...he replied... because he spelled damn correctly!

guess whom will the history remember?

Friday, September 15, 2006

How Mobile Phones have screwed my life!

mobile phones are omni-potent, present, porous, vorous and what not! most irritating creatures on earth...they are now found everywhere...from your best friend's hand to a hot girl's purse to a beggars bowl!

i had spend one year in singapore(a country obsessed with mobile phones) without having a handphone! everywhere i'd go..they would ask me...whats your handphone number...and hearing that i dont have one...they would give me a stare that would make even sachin tendulkar embarrased of his shots!

i finally decided to get one phone...and the next year was even more horrible than the first one. we had seperate halls in our somebody would keep messaging to open the door... please do this...and that. if that was not enough people would keep sending messages..and expect you to reply which obviously costed me! college teacher would call me whenever i would bunk! all the cca - clubs would inform me of the meeting 2 hours before the meeting..and i would be expected to join. all this is still bearable...but what i couldnt bear was the ringing of phone when i used to sleep. now...since i used to put alarm..i cudnt put it in silent mode...and invariably..someone would call and screw my dreams up!

so after that disastrous 1 year...i decided not to have a phone...even if it was damn cheap. but the phones didnt stop irritating whenever me and my friends would sit down to play of them will get a call...the moment his call would get over another will get call, and then another...and i will be left staring at the cards.

i am yet to decide which is greater of the two evil...having or not having a mobile phone...but 1 thing's for sure...both are great evil which hopefully mankind abolishes...maybe due to some other stupid reason like health hazards!

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

i was travelling in a bus.... it was a school picnic... i was in class five... everyone was having 'fun'....and suddenly i felt like peeing...badly...i controlled for some time, but it was getting more and more uncontrollable...then it happened...i let it front of everyone...everyone saw me and started was so bad....i felt like shitting in my pants...badly...and then my eyes opened....and my hand found out that the peeing in pant part was not just a was reality....and my feeling of shitting in my pants was not just my figment of imagination but bitter truth which needed to be acted on immediately.

'have you had a dream neo, which was more real than reality itself' - morpheus in the matrix..

hell yeah...i have had countless such dreams!

and i guess no one will throw tomatoes (not that neone can) on me when i say that most of us have had such dreams!

so then comes the point..what is better? dream world or 'reality'. is it better to believe in illusions and be happy or to be in real world and sad. is it better to have sex with an imaginary kate beckinsale (which will of course seem as real)...or to have sex with a disgusting whore in reality. and just in case you were waiting for the was a rhetorical question!

so why do people keep saying 'come back to reality'?? why should anyone come back to reality when the dream world is good and pleasurable. why is deluding oneself considered wrong or stupid or both!

french philosopher Jean Paul Sartre once said

'Like all dreamers I confuse disenchantment with truth.'

I am a dreamer....and i prefer enchantment to truth!